The thing about having a blog is that there are always ideas rummaging around in my head. If my brain had the ability to log into wifi while I was driving, then it would log on to Word Press and type out my thoughts in perfect little posts exactly the moment I thought of them, complete with photos. I’d probably have about 2 blog updates a day, actually. But, as it is, I never have the time to sit and just write it all out. And when I do, the quippy comments, sarcasm, and ideas I have on my way to home from day care when the hot little blue Corvette cuts me off at the green light and I have to slam on breaks, spilling soda in my lap with my 19 month old in the car who is screaming because he’s hot, tired, hungry, and he just threw Lamby in to the back seat of the van in a moment of frustration, but now wants him back, while I’m counting down the seconds until I pull in my driveway, slowly turning up the volume on country radio to try to soothe him (or drown him out?), well, all THOSE thoughts of angst fluttering in my head at that moment would find themselves well rested in a typed up blog post when I returned home.
Suffice to say, I do end up typing them out in my head while I’m in the moment, and it brings me a moment of solace. Kind of like I’m talking my way through it all. Having always enjoyed writing, though not necessarily claiming to be good at it, thoughts have often come to me in a “this is what I would write if I could…” sort of way.
Since my brain does not have wifi capabilities, yet, (Though, I did recently read an article about how people want surgical wifi implants in the brain! We aren’t there, but mark my word, it is coming one day. But I won’t get in to my geeked out science theories here)…I really would like to update more. I guess that’d require a lot of time that I need to allot for this. Moving has seemed to occupy our life these days. By that I mean the impending move that hasn’t happened yet. Our home is completely packed and we are living out of boxes and suitcases, awaiting a new closing date, which was supposed to be this past week but was pushed back. Basically we are in a domino situation. The buyers of our current home have not yet closed on THEIR home because the buyer of THEIR home hasn’t closed on THEIR home. So, we cannot close on our new home until this one closes. It’s all going to happen. We just wait. Additionally, I am also moving schools, as I have decided to go back to public school from private. Since we aren’t sure when we are closing on our house, and since it is likely we will have some limbo time where we have to stay with family until we close on the new place, I rented a storage unit today to put all my classroom things in. I needed them to be easily accessible and not lost in the home-box shuffle. It’s pretty safe to say that my entire life is in a box right now. With the exception of people and dogs. Won’t lie though. I’d like to box up the dogs somedays…
While I’m grateful the timing of the move worked out during summer break, it doesn’t make it any more “fun”. I’m a person who likes order and I’m having a really difficult time with the disorderliness of the past few weeks. We’ve been packed completely for almost 2 weeks now and I’m really stressed from the disarray. Sometimes when I look around my house I go in to a panic mode. My heart flutters, I’m instantly anxious, and all I want to do is fix it. But there’s little I can do. This weekend I decided I was going to straighten up what little i could around the house. Which meant that I spent 3 hours pretty much walking around in circles in my house, accomplishing very little except rearranging messes from one location to another. Any time we’ve moved in the past I’ve always had a “home” at work, where things were organized and just where they should be. Since I don’t have that at the moment either, I feel anxious no matter where I turn. Oh, the drawbacks of a Type-A personality.
Despite it all, I am so very thankful for an amazing husband who recognizes this craziness about me and has been supportive, and has gone the extra mile to keep me calm and make sure I’m having some independent downtime away from the chaos. Yesterday I had to apologize to him for being snippy, unfortunately, how I tend to get with him when I’m stressed. I’m really trying hard not to be this way….but, I really need to do better.
I think Blake takes after me in the disorganization of the home, because he’s showing his stress in lovely new ways…
This was because I wouldn’t let him eat dishwasher detergent…
I’ll admit that I’ve let some things slide. Like the time he wanted to try dog food. It’s edible, unlike dish detergent. Guess we haven’t quite reached the age of discerning what’s edible from what’s poison. That’s what mommies are for, right? And so mean we are.
We have entered tantrum city central in the past 2 weeks. Could be an age thing. Could be moving. Could be teething. Could be all 3. Remember all those times I’ve said “It just keeps getting better!. This is my favorite age! No, THIS is my favorite age”? That kind of excludes the past 2 weeks.
Hey. I’m just being honest.
There are moments when he’s away from the boxes and he’s outside…
And he tries to mow the lawn with his bubble mower. Cuteness at its finest. (Okay. Yes, there are always beautiful and lovable moments at every age.)
You know, the other thing about having a blog is that one day your kid just may hate you for posting embarrassing photos of them throwing temper tantrums on the floor.
But, in his favor, there may be wifi brain implants by then and I’m sure he’ll get us back with instantaneous, and quippy comments with his photos. He is a Mason after all. And Mason’s are notoriously and ingeniously stubborn, sardonic, and masters at getting even.
Sooooooo may be before that happens I should just delete this whole blog….In T minus 25 years…
To wrap up.
The thing about having a blog is that there a hundred and one posts I want to write about.
- The joys of temper tantrums
- Time Outs
- How I’ve finally accepted my mommy life after almost 2 years of being one. (Am I crazy and alone here???)
- My (our) thoughts of having a 2nd child
- My views on educating and choosing schools
- Being on a strict schedule with your child and not succumbing to pressure from others about still needing to “live for your life”
Those are just a few. Thankful summer break is here! May be I’ll get a chance to write!